Here I go again...

I've reached this point where "now" is wasting time until I can see him again.

How in the hell did this happen. I mean... last week, I was in my car, blasting the ultimate single-and-loving-it-song "99 Problems (But a bitch ain't one)"... singing at the top of my lungs, enjoying my freedom to spend my money on what-the-fuck I want to spend it on.

Resigning my fate to actually be alone for a while.

Making the best of it.

And as he put it...

Richard fell into my lap.

Even though he'd kinda been in my lap for a long time, but I guess I was too caught up in my own bullshit to give him a second look.

But I guess he was caught up in his own bullshit, too.


I would sit at my computer, in my bedroom and rant and blog about the good times and bad times with Big, while the man I've been asking for all along sat at his computer, in his bedroom, not even a 2 minute walk from my door and boosted my ego to the point that I absolutely had to continue with this thing.

You're the man, baby.